Boski's Blogopoluza!

So far.

I got nothing today. I have blown all my A-stuff on other people's comments section. I really have to focus on delivery the daily brew of nonsense that a handful of you look forward to.

Had an uneventful weekend. A little bit of this, a little bit of that. Some time with the Boski Clan. Other than that I have nothing. I am trying to warm up to the Super Bowl. I thought I would have been over the beat down the Broncos took by Wednesday, but I should be finally over it in the next 30 minutes or so.

I did get good new last week. I will be freed of the dungeon Friday. At that time, I will be exchanged for 3 KGB spies at Checkpoint Charlie.

I will be taking the time off to work on getting ready for our trip, and digging anti tank trenches, to defend the homeland.

Well that is all the steam hot lame that is the Boskiverse I have right now. I will try to bring you the best in all things useless.

Today I got an unexpected day off. Which would have been nice if it was not for the those in my fair city who encroached on our compound.

Yesterday, a city street crew came out to our home, while we were at work and proceeded to do work with out our consent. Which would be fine if they did not come on to our property and damage it. Seriously WTF!

We come home and see a couple and find:

a couple of city orange cones in our yard

a patch of asphalt where a part of our bushes used to be (which look ridiculous, if you are going to that, then put in concrete it now looks like crap

broken tree and bush branches thrown back into the yard

and dirt thrown back into the bushes

To sum it up it, this was the intersection of retarded and ridiculous. Welcome to Retardulous. (thanks Mrs. Boski)

So we called the cops and had them come out and see it. The officer was nice enough to come out talk to us and give us a name to call the next day.

Since Mrs. Boski had a ton of pressing issues at work, I volunteered to stay home and try to get answers. So I was out in the sunshine today, but not for reasons I wanted.

I called the city and they are going to looking into it. They sent out someone to take a look. The guy actually was a neighbor of ours. We talked and he informed me that someone probably complained about the that spot. The area in question, the sidewalk does get narrow, and there is a light pole in the middle. So that someone probably called and said that they could not navigate their wheelchair, or whatever through. So it has to be opened up to allow proper access. Which I completely understand and would have been happy to clear that out and let the city put in pavement. But no one even called us, or even sent us a letter. If I find out who it is they may get a right thrashing. Okay, I can't thrash them, but I feel better for getting that out. But I will express displeasure to them that they did not even extend the courtesy to tell us they had a problem. I have a feeling this is the same person who came out and ripped some bushes out of our beds and threw them out in the street. Who ever you are, you are a bastard and may you consume some really bad soup.

The guy from the city, was surprised at what he saw, and let me know that he was going to yell at someone, because it look ridiculous. This is not over. Team Boski will get answers. I just worry that the city will soon violate our neutrality and invade us.

And still my roto hoops team sucks ass. Great.

Monday saw another installment of the continuing decline of civilization "Wobbling and Flumbling on Ice with C-List Celebs". And again I did not see the spills I had hoped for. The only "star" hitting the ice was Todd Bridges, who I felt bad for. The guy did his best and came along way in a short time, but that ended Todd's time on the show. Well now he can pick up those manager shifts at Denny's in Culver City.

Notes from the show:

Mr. Jenner, Joan Rivers called and she is asking you to tone down on the face lifts. What is the deal with that Bruce, what did you need corrective surgery after doing "Can't Stop the Music"?

"Funny Man" "David Coulier" again put up a dull performance. I think one judge put it as, "you did nothing out there". I was just waiting for the shot of "Dave's" "agent" looking into the camera and saying. "Now you can see why I can even book him as a party clown."

Another interesting thing about "Dave" and Nancy's performance. They used a stool as a prop which was an apt metaphor for them. Well she's wooden and he's just stool.

The Audience - I think that the producers of the show have them boo when the judges give low scores. Look you slacked jaw yokels. Sir John Nicks has forgotten more about skating than any of you will ever know. Look the man is training the Sasha Cohen. So suck it if he give Debbie Gibson a bad score because she f'ed up. Seriously people.

The Host - Mr. Hamilton, I am glad you survived cancer and you had a great career, but can you stop yelling in octaves that piss off every animal with in a 3 block radius of my home. Love the energy, but I am not in love with the energy.

Jillian Barbarie - Hmmm a Fox show and Jillian's a Fox personality. And let's see, oh Jillian you competitivley skated before, so I don't think that would be unfair or anything. But how would Fox allow this, since their entertainment and news departments are pillars of integrity? (I know there are tribes in the Amazon yet to be discovered that knew that joke was coming.) Of all people, they picked her. A woman so annoying that Mother Teresa would take a swing at her. Saying she is shrill would be an offence to shrill. But this week, Jillian ran into problems. She suffered a groin pull. Maybe all those years working in those truck stop bathrooms is catching up. Hey I am here all week.

Coming up Bowling with Animal Stars

Well my year in sports. The Broncos run to glory was beaten into a an Orange and Blue paste Sunday, by the Steelers. Denver had no answers and Evil Jake made a brief appearance at the end of the 1st half to effectively end the competitive phase of the AFC Championship. Oh well, I could not expect the White Sox and Broncos to win at the same time, that would probably have exhausted any good luck or karma for at least 40 years.

The Broncos did have a good year, even with the disappointing end, but they played way above expectations. Now we will see what happens with them in 2005. I did not realize that they are way over the cap, but hopefully we can keep the important parts and build from this year. Hopefully this will be like 1996 came out of no where then become favorites to win the Super Bowl and then soil themselves at home. So that mean we go and win it all in 2006. Probably not, but that is the great thing about football is that seasons are now being won in March, April, May and June, with the roster moves and draft picks.

With the Bronco loss it does mean I can enjoy the Super Bowl and not sweat it out.

So congrats to the Steelers who have more than earned this trip. Now I am rooting for them to win it all so the King of the Desert Hooligans can see his team win it after the many near misses.

I just real surpassed that Vegas has made them a 3 1/2 favorite. Even though the AFC is head and shoulders above the NFC this year. I still thought that with Seattle's win they would have been given the nod, but in the next too weeks this line is going to move. I think it may get to Pittsburgh at 5 1/2. I just see so many people getting on the Steelers. Then come back to about 4 1/2 - 4. I can already see the Seahawks using this for motovation over the next two weeks.

Speaking of that I do expect we will see an entertaining game, unlike the majority of Super Bowls in the past. Which never stopped me from watching. But even I get tired of all the hype. That is why College Football needs a playoff system, so they can play that Championship Game the weekend before the Super Bowl. Hey, just a thought.

Well I have to get back to the exciting world of data entry.

Last night we watched Skating with Celebrities. Look my wife should not be forced to watch the NFL network and ESPN 24 hours a day. Even though I am against "reality" TV there are some that just can not be avoided. This is one of them.

First, I think they should have named the show Skating with Stars. Sure that would be too close to Dancing with the Stars. But who are we kidding. Everyone know that Fox steals anything that is not bolted down. Also, looking at the caliber of "celebrities" the use of the phrase stars would be logical. Since these people are all fiery bodies of gas.

I do not condone violence or brutality, but I watched in hopes of seeing C-list stars injure themselves, not seriously. Okay I am looking into seeing someone about this.

Even though I did not get the amount of thrills, spills and chills I had hoped, the thought of it is still there, so I am in.

There was a seriously missed opportunity at comedy last night. They were talking to "funny man" David Coulier who was asked by one of the judges, "What would you rather be holding? A hockey stick or Nancy Kerriagn? His answer was Nancy, but what he should have said was,

"Let's see, one is wooden and angular and the other one I can shoot a hockey puck with. Hmmm."

Again it is just one man's opinion.

Thanks again for viewing my shame and please fill out the comment cards.

What was supposed to be just a few week assignment just keeps getting extended. Another busy week doing administrative scut work (killing the brain cells one data entry key stroke at a time). Again do not get me wrong, I am drawing a check to fund that future kelp farm I have always wanted. The people here are nice and I have some healthcare administrations skills, but even if they offered me a job, I think I would say, "thanks, but no thanks." The underground thing is a pain (please sue Devo's "Working in a Coalmine"), but the other thing that gets me.

The half hour lunch.

But Matt that means you get out a half hour earlier.

Yeah, yeah save it. I hated it at Disney and I hate it here.

To me I like having an hour where "the man can't touch me". The other problem with only a half hour is that due to the location, I am stuck at the hospital. The big treat is getting on a tram to go the mall. Hmmm I am craving an Orange Julius right now.

I enjoy getting out of the office and being away from from my desk. I can let the sense of dread and tedium subside even if it is ever so briefly.

I know I should not gripe, it's not like I am Jurgis and I am working my shift at Brown and Company packing meat.

Maybe I should just realize that I am a square peg in this round hole world and should chuck it all and write "history".


While you here.

It has been busy to the point where I have not had a chance to ramble about the Broncos win Saturday night (yes, it was a bad call on the PI, I am not going to argue that and Bailey's Int has questions). It was not too long ago on this little blog, I had so many questions about this team and it's direction. Now they are one game away from the Super Bowl. And now their chances of getting there are much improved. I am not saying Sunday will be a walk in the park. If Denver had to go to Indy it would have been trying to scale Everest in flip-flops, now it is only trying to scale K-2 with one bunny slipper and one flip flop. But if Denver loses I can live with the Steelers going on, I will be bummed, but not catatonic. It would also make my friend the King of the Desert Hooligans very happy.

As for the NFC, I think we are going to have ourselves a good old-fashion rake fight. I think this game will be very entertaining and I think Carolina can pull one off (cue for all of you out there to bet on Seattle). I think Team Potted Meat fate is in the hands and the skull of Alexander and his bruised brain. If he can play then he opens up their passing game. If Seattle wins it will have the distinction of having the ugliest uniforms ever to play in a Super Bowl.

More on this as the week goes on.

With the whole Abramoff scandal and ensuring trial's, it made me think wistfully about one of my favorite political corruption cases. Let's go back in time to 1980 and Abscam. It was bribery, grainy video, corruption and shame. It had it all.

All of those memories made me think that CSPAN really needs to start a third channel. CSPAN - Classic. Just like ESPN Classic.

Just think:

Seeing Tip O'Neal as he battles Reagan and the Republicans, all the while he fights against sobriety. You can not tell me there is not a tape of him and Teddy getting ripped. Ripped to the point that would have made Otis from Mayberry blush.

Iran-Contra - Let's look back see how a president, who may have been incapacitated, avoids troubles. As his minions sell dangerous weapons to Iran. Totally going against Rapping Ronnies whole "we do not negotiate with terrorist" mantra .

The Wonderful World of Watergate - See how the Constitution is supposed to work, and that a power crazy president who breaks the law was brought to justice. Wait that might anger people if they realize that what our Fearless Leader, who not even qualified to be Assistant Manager at a Stuckey's, has committed even more brazen violations of the Constitution.

This Old House 'The K Street Addition' - Bob Villa and Jack Abramoff look at how to renovate PAC's, Lobbyist and other Beltway Cronies. So they can graft like new.

Senate Hearing Bloops, Bleeps and Blunders - See all the stuff that never saw the light of day.

Legislative Buzzer beaters - You will witness the Congress work hard and pass important legislations just as the session about to close. See all the pork barreling action you crave. See how bridges to nowhere and $800 hammers are attach themselves like big ugly smelly barnacles.

Who needs the Improve - enjoy hours of fun, as you hear the comic styling of "B-1" Bob Dornan, Jessie Helms and Strom "I used to hang with Jeff Davis" Thurmond.

Fabulous Filibusters - See people talk and talk and talk and talk.

From across the Pond - For those who how are fans of the British Parliament you will get hours of the best back bench hazing from the House of Commons.

And for after dark - "The Clarence Thomas Confirmation Hearings" the unrated version.

Now who is with me.

As Head groundskeeper here at Bushwood, I would like to apologize for some of the entries that look a bit mangy. The computer I have the greatest access to, and blog from has some issues. I have to e-mail them to Blogger. Why? Because for some reason the person before me jacked up this machine and caused is to react to Blogger and almost everything else like it has Bell's Palsy. So the text looks funny and some pages it will not format right. So, I spend like 5 minutes scrolling down to see the text on a page. The settings for display are of no help. My options are large, larger for the blind, which would make this problem even worse. Thanks to the screwed up visuals, I can get in to Editing/Posting area, but I can not type anything in (Maybe for the reading public that for the best). So I have to type it up on Word, copy it to Yahoo and mail it to Blogger. Come on there were less moves in the 16th game of the World Chess Championships when Kasparov beat Karpov. Little known fact: Karpov lost but his late Bishop to Knight 4 and brilliant use of the Pozen Defense,was enough for the underdog to cover the 4 1/2 piece spread. Vegas took a bath that weekend.

Today I am at another PC, so this will hopefully be better, just the same lovable writing gaffes you have grown to love. But now with 73% less Yahoo ads.

Please enjoy "The Blair Warner is a Bitch Project".

Which Gilded Age President would be the best fit for a TV-Sitcom?

Rutherford B. Hayes

James Garfield

Chester A. (I have got bitchen mutton chops) Arthur

Grover Cleveland

Benjamin Harrison

Grover Cleveland Version 2.0

William McKinley

My choice would have been both Grover Cleveland's. But Mr. Boski what do you mean both Grover Cleveland's? Well the history books list him as the only non-consecutive termed president. But in actuality, Jules Verne cloned him. Mr. Verne cloned Grover because of a two-week opium bender with Thomas Nast and P.T. Barnum. Nast and Barnum had been berating Verne that he was a hack and shooting a cannon at the moon was "dumber than Napoleon the III". So he vowed to show them and show them he did. He created a fantastic cloning machine and cloned Mr. Cleveland as he was finishing up as the governor of New York and was embarking on his presidential campaign. The machine was only 98% ready, which lead to the copy that had an overactive shenanigan gland (that was according to leading phrenologists of the time). But sadly Verne's had some serious DT's coming down from the opium along with giant vultures dispatched by thHapsburggs destroyed the machine and any hope of fixing GC 2.0. Oh the mischief this caused. This was the basis of Verne's book "The Will of an Eccentric".

Another little know fact about this absolutely true nugget of American history was that Grover Cleveland 2.0, cost Grover Cleveland the 1888 election. This was achieved by 2.0's offending enough Ohioans with his drunken two-fisted tirades through the state, and his constant replacing the B in Buckeye with an F when talking about the Buckeye State. Grover Cleveland the Orginal, finally was able to corral 2.0 and end his reign of terror. In an little know 1892 duel, 2.0 was wounded from a derringer shot from Grover the Original's facial hair. Wounded and ashamed, 2.0 then fled to Portugal. Where he then raised a cat army that was poised to challenge the balance of power in Europe. Sadly, when 2.0 was ready to pounce upon Eurpoe, it all came to a tragic end. In 1908, he made the mistake of wearing a general's uniform made entirely out of tuna. His army then ate him. The cat army was not heard from again until the 1928 Olympic Games when they tried to enter as the independent state of Hairballistan.

As you can see that this has all the makings of a hit show on the WB with Chad Michael Murray. Who is with me?

Well I did say I was going to do this but it's going to be half assed, like most of what you find here. Well what about 2005? It was the best of times and it was the so - so of times (That was Dickens first attempt. Well I will say seeing the White Sox finally grab the brass ring was the tops. While not being employed full time for anyone was a refreshing kick in the nuts, that and parts of HFH trip to Kauai.

So where to begin.

Blogging -

Good

- I think I have improved the blogging. I have tried to take out the Victor Hugo long- wilderness.

- Meeting some awesome bloggers for drinks in L.A.

Bad

- I am still the one writing it. I am trying to find someone with better writing chops and life experiences than myself. It will really help get this blog off the ground. Thank god, I do not have to handwrite this. Trust me, my penmanship looks like a seismic graph and it constantly at 3.2 tp 3.4 on the Ricther Scale.


Travel - I actually made a couple of trips out of the Coastal Table in 2005.

San Diego for the BH birthday, enjoyed great Mexican Food and drink, while staying at the worst LaQuinta Inn, in America.

Atlanta - A short trip to the "dirty south" for a HFH meeting. It was my first "business trip" from Kenner. Drank Coke from it's natural spring and was almost eaten by a polar bear.

Kauai - 10 days in a garden paradise building homes, meeting some fantastic people and
seeing spectacular sites. But it came at a price. Some of our group, fantastic great people,
but there were some who I wish never to see again. If you ever speak to me in person I
could tell you more.

Las Vegas - the BH's birthday gift to me that was so awesome it finishes a respectable second to the Sox winning it all this year.

2006 - It will be a return engagement to Northern Ireland with a side trip to Dublin for HFH. Then when we are done a couple of days in London.

Music/TV/Movies

Bad

- Lost all the music I had stol . . . er procured thanks to a crapy hard drive from Fry's.

- The number of entertainment shows is still growing.

- Ryan Seacrest still walks the earth.

- NBC's bastardization of the Office, what you didn't screw the pooch enough on Coupling?

- The bitter end of Arrested Development - which was a more real look at the OC than the OC.


The Bad that will not apologize for

Andy Milanokis - I am sorry everyone, but I love it even though everyone hates it. Okay begging your mocking.

Good

- I-pod - I know understand.

- Recovery of some of the lost music. Thanks to the Red Head IT man.

- BBC America for another year of bringing me great programs. Wire In the Blood, Waking the Dead, Little Britain, The Night Detective and most importantly The Mighty Boosh.

- Snoop Dogg in concert, Yes I said that. Love him or hate him. He puts on a show. He was the last act Summer Jam and the man played for over 2 hours with a full band and shit load of special guest.

LCD Soundsystem - Saw them at the Mouse of Blues for free and they were great.

(Look, I am all over the board musically so please bear with me.)


The World and the dumb bastards running it.

I do not think I could have a good section as long as Enos is still president.

Sports

Good

The Ice Cream Fantastic Journey of the White Sox

UCLA Football - hopefully we will actually be able to saty within 35 of USC.

Did I mention the White Sox

Mike Shanahan's greatest coaching job - Look Jake Plummer threw 7 Int's all year. He made the Cleveland Boatlift work. He nearly had 2 1,00 yard rushers and he the rookie DB's have played way above expectations. Give Coach of the Year to Lovie Smith, but give Shanahan the Nobel. Jake Plummer only 7 Ints.


Getting Hockey back

Northern Ireland beating England in Belfast for the first time in 78 years

I finally won a NCAA pool

Saw Vince Young go crazy and show that he was a man amongst boys as he beat, Michigan. Okay I was there a year early, but a great game anyway.

Bad

The Broncos getting the bejezus beaten out of them by the Colts.

The Broncos select "Maurice Clarett"

The loss of Indoor Lacrosse. Yes another one of my vices.

UCLA getting the wrong end of a broom handle in an uncomfortable place by USC.

Ireland not making the World Cup



Well kids that is all I have for you on the year that was. Hopefully 2006 will be year of better blogging.

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT: After 2 failed drug tests Englebert Humperdink was disqualified and the Mandrel Sisters Family New Year and Ultimate Fighting Championship was won by Charo.