Boski's Blogopoluza!

Great it looks like the Old White Sox have reared their ugly heads tonight. Blowing a three run lead at home, playing horrible defense, climbing back in and tying it up just to give up a bomb in the 9th. Great I am having flash back to last year and the year before that and so on.

I know we still have a good lead in the division, but this series is important. We need to show we are for real and that dreaming about a World Series is an exercise in Futility of biblical proportions. The only solace I can take from this is that the majority of viewers to Boski Olde Time Blog will be happy with the Red Sox winning. I hope we can all still be friends after this and the possible playoff meeting. I extend that also to the O's contingent, even though you have thrown your lot in with the devil Tito Fucking Landrum.

Thank you Carl Everett for the third out. Arrrggggggggggggg.

Well I off to drink some turpentine.

I keep hearing about this movie. I heard that it purchased for something like 9 million at Sundance. There seems to be a lot of buzz, but I just don't get it. Who would want to see a movie about Pete Rose and Flo from Alice. I do not even see how that could even be a good buddy flick or even a romantic comedy. Maybe if they added a time traveling pie, then it would make some sense. Well I will just have to go and see it.

So the guessing is over and Bush has his nominee, John Roberts.

John who? I do not know a whole lot about the man, so I will sit back and watch the nomination and draw my conclusions from that. This pick has a very Souteresque feel to it. I just want the Dems to make him answer questions real or hypothetical. Let us see where you stand on issues.

Maybe the Neo-Cons are saving the looney for Reihnquist's spot. Knowing that cabal they will pick a judge so out their that it would make even G. Gordon Liddy uneasy.

But no matter what I think they picked the wrong Roberts. They should have gone with:



The Bipster. I miss Bip. How could you not love Bip Roberts. Also along with adding speed to the top of the line up, which is desperately needed (When was the last time you saw Ginsburg leg out an extra base hit). You will have a fair minded justice who sit just a little left of center on the judical spectrum. Just think of him as a cross between former Justices John Marshall and Warren, but not as good with the glove. God you have not lived till you seen Warren turn two.

Update from the Costal Table

Sorry I have been busy trying to find a job to support my QVC habit. I know, I know I should have watched that After School Special with Patrick Duffy, Jonathan Lipnicki and Princess Margaret. Look I was too busy huffing paint.

Well what is going on?

Job Front – I kicked ass yesterday, but the job is not mine yet. I still have one more person to speak to. Hell I would have hired me yesterday. Well that is at least until I got to my car where I argued with myself about pay and then insulted my self and then rescinded my own offer letter. I had to call security. I am afraid I will have to get a restraining order for myself, yet again.

Baseball – White Sox continue to amaze me. I sit here in mid July and see the Twins are 13 games back. 30 – 5 against the AL Central. Which people will say well that division sucks you got the Royals. Well I say to the AL East you got the Devil Rays and to the West the Mainers are still dwelling in the cellar. But as we get to August we will get the playoff preview. Twins, Yanks, O’s and Red Sox.

Football – it is almost here and my wife is bracing for the worst as the NFL Network will be showing 55 games in 25 days. As she watches her husband nearly O.D. on three and outs and poor special teams play.

Car – well yesterday I had to turn in the clown car. It was a sad, floppy show squeaking parting. I will miss you and the shame you brought me clown car. So does that mean the new Boskimobile is here? No not yet. I am in another car, my dream car at least till Saturday. The Better Half’s Mom who was so very kind in letting me use her car while she is out of town. I love driving this car and would be somewhere in the Central Time Zone if the radio worked. Doh! I blame the Insurance Company for being a-holes and not getting that fixed for her. Oh well, I am still driving it. I think the car may be taking out a restraining order on me. But I do have to shake myself out of my BMV haze and think about what to get next.

Music – I am still mourning the loss of the music. Some of that pain will subside when we get the big ass hard drive for Team Boski’s computer. But in the meantime I will just make due with Sirius. It is better than I imagined. To quote Captain Murphy from Sealab 2021, “it’s like a koala craping rainbows in my brain”. Also Sunday, we caught Tears for Fears at the O.C. County Fair. Yes we have a county fair in the O.C., which is very short carnie toss from the Boski compound. The Better Half and I loved it. They sounded great. For the Better Half it was a bigger deal, she saw them 20 years ago this month, at the same venue. So it was a stroll down memory lane.

Here is the cherubic face that has won the hearts of Team Boski this summer.


Here is what the critics are saying:

"Andy Milonakis Show whips a horse ass with a belt." Wesley Willis Weekly World News.

"Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha" The Better Half

"If you loved "Circus of The Stars" then check out Bravo. Here you get a kid with a pancake on his face." Cat Fancy

"Blasting you away with semi-automatic wit and witisims" New woman's Guns and Gardens

"I can taste the colors" Boski superfluous Monthly

TB has loved young Andy since we first say him on Kimmel singing his classic "The Super Bowl is Gay". I know some and maybe most of you will say that this is the dumbest show ever. Well as long as you put six d list celebs in a house and tape it, then this is Masterfuckingpiece Theater.

Team Boski has also been watching the following:

Hell's Kitchen - I know this goes against my reality show tirades, but I can watch Gordon. Sure some of the stuff on this is retarded and cheesy, but he still makes the show watch able. I will actually recommend his shows on BBC America, especially his Kitchen Nightmare Show. What we like about it is he will not bullshit with the cooks and the owners. He is hard on them but fair and actually tries to get them on a track that will give them a chance to succeed. Just watch it.

The Tick the animated series - I do not know who made the call to bring it back but I say thank you. The Better Half turned me on to the Tick back in 94. She had seen the comic book while back at school so she was a fan. I forgot how great this show was. You watch this and you be even more upset that Fox soiled itself with a live action version. They should have stuck with the animated version.

Entourage - as I have said before this show is great.

Family Guy - I do not know how he does it but this show has gotten better.

Robot Chicken - Damn you Seth Green I have to wait till 06 for more of this delicious and addictive chicken.

Harvey Birdman - I know there seems to be an abundance of cartoons on this list. Some would think that is just childish and that I am drawn to this medium because it soothes my semi-conductor speed attention span. Well to those critics, I say you are wrong. The art of animation allow the creators to explore the complex milieu of today's society. . . oh look sting, he he he he. . . string.

So with that being said I will close this entry with the theme from the Andy Milonakis Show:

Sing it if you know it.

-I rock pea's on ma head, but don't call me a pea head
-bees on ma head, but don't call me a bee head
-bruce lee's on ma head, but don't call me a lee head
-now please excuse me,i gots to get ma tree fed.
-you rock the brands and i make ma own clothing.
-i hang out with an apple who love self loathing "I hate myself"
-pancake on ma face, makes me extra happy
-i like shampoo bottles that sit on ma lappy
-caus its ma show u can't tell me what to do.
-when life hands me lemons,i make beef stew.
-I know to go but its time for me to rock it
-I put Bologna in ma left pocket
-smear some creamy cheese in my gold locket.
-its ma show IM Andy milonakis
-its ma show IM shmandi's shmiloshmakis
-its ma show IM Andy milonakis

Thank you and good night.

Glad to have you back, but seriously guys you are going to have to bust your ass to make me care. You have to fill the hole that was left by the Anaheim Storm going belly up. Here I was thinking I was going to have to go to Belfast to watch hockey again.

That is all I have now on that. Please sit back and enjoy Don Cherry's Sensitivity Training Seminar.

It sucks. It so sucks ass. I hate it, and I am awful at it. As you can see, I am still without a real job. A job that is not temporary or requires fries with it. I should learn my lesson and not go to any more of these temp agencies. It is always the same. Oh Boski, come in and meet us so we can talk. What that means is filling out an application and a crap load of paperwork, take testing that you have done millions of time and watch bad 80's safety videos. Usually this take and hour and half to two. When most of the goddamn info is on my resume. You know that things you are going to send to prospective employers. Oh sure you need something for your records, but you take those forms and pare them down so you have the info you need. Also it would save time for both of us. Look I have an episode of Mama's Family I am missing. So what do you get for your wait, other than really bad soft jazz radio? Five to ten minutes of reviewing everything you just wrote down and that was on your resume, then asking the same obligatory questions. All of this to find out that "great opportunity" they brought you in for rarely materializes. You end up giving these people all this info, just so you can get a call: to handwrite addresses on envelopes, fold letters, or sit next to Jessco the Inbred for eight hours of soul crushing tedium.

But I still do that and the posting on all the job sites. I have found a couple of good assignments along the way but obviously not the right one. The problem is at young age of 33, I still have no clue what I am good at or what I want to do. I just know I just want to get in somewhere where I do not hate what I do, or the people I work with. Is that so wrong?

Well there is a little bit of hope. I have a second interview Monday with a company I spent nearly two hours interviewing with Monday. The strange part is this interview is for another position at the same place. They didn't hate me enough to thanks, but no thanks. So Monday I am going in there and try to generate the magic that is Boski. So I will be making shit up, just kidding. I can be engaging and sound like I know what I am talking about from time to time.

So I just have to follow some very wise advice I have heard over the years.

"Go real fast, then if something gets in my way turn." Look if it is good enough for skiing the K-12 then hell it is good enough for me.

So if you want to know about more fun at the Temp Agencies then send a self addressed envelope and $98.77 to:

The Men Without Hats Home for Wayward 80's One Hit Wonders
Attn: Murray Head
P.O. 8765309
Railto, CA 9 something, something, something and a prime number

In my ramblings. I do sadly remember what goes on in the world around us. I do not have much to say that has not been said by many. But what transpired in London is both sad and sobering.

Hello good people of Bloggsylvania. I have returned from my long trip from. . . Nowhere. I have been busy but not too busy. The past week or so I have been trying to juggle the following:

Getting a check from my insurance

Research new cars

Drink heavily to drown the shame of driving a clown car

Looking for a job

Going to interviews

Getting my free-range opossum farm off the ground (I swear its going to hit big)

Going to temp/employment agencies

Working on getting people for our Kauai trip.

Crank calling Jamie Farr, for old time sakes

Trying to read every Pro and College football preview magazine I can get my hands on. I am trying to get my self on a preseason football bender that would make Madden take pause.

and finally

Rooting for the pluckiest team in baseball. Thank god the AL won the All-Star Game. Now if miracles happen and we get to the promise land we get home field. Look everyone you want the White Sox to win the Series. It is not only good for me, but you and most importantly baby Panda's. If the Sox do not win they are all going to go nuts and I will not be responsible. So root for the Sox wont you.

I am sad to report that the Black Honda Civic that has been the Boskimobile has gone rabid and I going to have to put Ol' Yeller down. This car has been though a lot in the time it has served as the official staff car of Boski Corp.

What that car and I have shared over those 134,000 plus miles of service:

2 trips to Phoenix
1 trip to Las Vegas
Too many to count to SD and LA
2 accidents that resulted in damage
2 accidents that resulted no damage
8 jobs
1 stolen license plate
Millions of tons worth of sports mags and newspapers strewn in the back and trunk.
2 Bronco Super Bowls
3 Lakers Championships
1 White Sox Division title
Over a 100 sporting events
12 concerts
Countless numbers of soft drinks put in cup holder
17 times spilt soda all over floor of car
2 moves
2 Flats and 1 near blow out
4,000,000 blows to the steering wheel and console, due to anger at road, or lack of CD player operations.
17 CD’s the usual number that resided in my glove compartment and under the seats.
One laundry detergent stain (Not my fault)
I will say about 80,000 hours of AC use.

And

One wedding

Yesterday I had to go down and collect my belongings from it and it looked so sad, marked up with grease pens, its front end removed and dirty. After going through the car and seeing a lot of stuff I forgot about, I sat in it one last time. Thought about all the time I spent in that car and said thank you. I am not an easy person to be a car for. I was hoping that the car demise would have come from me trying to jump the Snake River Canyon.

So now I have to get a settlement and get a car fast. Since, I do not want to be in my rental clown car anymore. Because after today, I pay. So what do I get?

Right now here are the early front runners:

AMC Pacer

Yugo

Ford Pinto

Family Truckster (with optional family rally pack)

79 Toyota Corolla Deluxe (the original Boskimobile, which was actually christened the Slashmobile, named after a run in it had with a truck, which was on my sister’s watch, and for Johnny Slash from Square Pegs.)

Please let me know if you have any suggestions. Please enjoy dramatic reading by Jackie Stewart.

NHL???? Sadly I had that same thought seeing hockey on the front page of the sports section. Sadly the players realize this now. The players lose a year and will end up with even less when the new agreement is eventually signed. But will anyone care. We will see. Note to Sean Avery, sure I do appreicate the appology. A little late, but you came forward.

Hank Stram RIP – one of the few Chiefs I can not hate. A man who was an innovator good (the moving pocket, scouting, getting miked for Super Bowl IV) and bad (the bad patent leather cleats) Look when you get to the pearly gates. Just run that 65 Toss Power Trap. It will pop wide open. As you matriculate down the field. Hey since you are on the way, could you take the Admiral with you. Thanks.

The White Sox are still holding a 9 ½ game lead in the Central, over the Twins.

The quite before the storm, NFL training camps will be opening soon. I have to finish reading all the preseason guides. So I can make some really god awful predications.

London punks Paris for 2012 games. Take that Frenchie. Thank god New York did not win. If they hosted the games it would have been the New Coke of Olympics.

We just got word this weekend that we are going back to Northern Ireland in April. We will going to build in the same place which is nice. Had such a memoriable time last year. I can not wait to get back.

I hope everyone is enjoying their holiday. Team Boski is going to enjoy some dogs on the grill and watch as the neighbors detonate illegal fireworks while consuming enough alcohol to make Yeltsin take pause. Which can make for some lovely theater. Well we watch that and some Twlight Zone. Which has always been a Fourth of July tradition. I just hope the hooligans will tire out before 3 in the morning, since the Better Half has a long day of work and I get the decison on my car.

So I say to everyone, please have a safe and sane holiday. Please take time to think about those who came before and were apart of making of this country. Both good and bad. Remember the sacafices made, tears shed and the freedoms won. Also how important those freedoms are. So thanks to all those who have served this counrty. Especially to all those known and unknow who served to make America great, and not in a jingoistic manner.

Sorry kids, but from what I watched, Live 8 sucked. Please do not get me wrong. I am happy to Bob getting reiled up. This needed to be done, and we need to get an awareness going that things are not fine and dandy. I hope that the "Long Walk to Justice" in Scotland goes well. We do not need Seattle WTO II Electric Boogaloo. But hand it to MTV/VH1 to screw things up. Look to the VJ's to shut up and go to the acts. Look most of these jackasses can't count to eight, let alone discuss the G-8. That is just this man's opinion. Also there were a lot of acts that sucked. Glad you came, but seriously Maria Carey. Look Maria you did not have to sing you could of donated all the money you got for getting dropped by your label. Madonna, thanks, thanks for screwing up Guy Richie. You pay twice. Good Charlote, there is nothing good about you. This still will not get you out for the deal you made to get successful. I could go on, but I won't.

Sorry for any spelling errors, the old spell check is being a pain. Please continue on with your day.

Me being the history buff I forgot that this virtual homeless blanket has turned 1 year Last month. Oh where has the time gone. I would like to thank the dozen who have come here. You have survive, bad football pronostication, my first trip abroad, bad historical and pop culture reference. You are all a little closer to heaven for surviving this literary hell.

So thank you to my man here. Thanks to his blog I was able to catch up with him again.

Also thank you to all those out there who have had be stumble upon you blog and spew pure nonsence. Thank you for indulging me and not calling the authorities. Sadly, my best work is on comment sections of those blogs, not here.

So as thanks, please sit back and enjoy the best of Breakdancing with Larry Storch.

Yesterday was out with Better Half and she had to return something. So I wander around Men's department. I was obiviously in the cool hip edgy section. It made me think, what can I wear without looking like a complete ass. I do try to expand my wardrobe. Trying to stay hip and fit in with the "kids". You see if I was left to my own devices, I would still wear nothing but Nike, Addidas, Reebok and team appreal and shorts. All year and for every event. Which is great if you still in college and living at home. Oh sure, I have come a long way (thanks to the Better Half). She does not see me walk out of the house in Winter with a pair of khaki shorts, Nike Tee, a loud obnoxious purple Northwestern Sweatshirt (circa 95 when they played in the Rose Bowl) and a minor leauge baseball cap, thinking that is alright for the ballet. With the help of Garanimals and electro-shock. I know what matches now. I know understand that it is okay to look like a bad extra from the Soprano's. But as I get older I am determined not to go the way of Golfer/Dad wear. I just can't do it.

But am I at an age where if I got that Green/Yellow/White Members Only jacket, would it be trying too hard to stay hip? I can hear it now, "hey check that out, or wow what a loser". Or, "he still thinks it cool to wear, and he is not being ironic".

Oh well, I will keep fighting the battle, even though I would have taken the Men At Work - Cargo Tour Shirt and wore it with pride if they had the right size.

P.S. Have I stepped into Bizzaro World. Becasue growing up it used to be LeTigre was the cheap cousin of Izod. So why is it that they are selling LeTigre for 45+. WTF! What is next, Tuffskins will make a come back and you will see people droping $80 on some sweet chocolate brown cords!

Well Thursday I had to go get a rental car, since I took my Civic to get repairs on it from my February run in with a dumbass. Yes they blamed me, but the person was a moron. Panic stopping because they thought the intersection had cameras.

So I go to Enterprise and get a Blue Chevy Aveo, which is Latin for clown car. Sweet, nothing like rolling in the Aveo. The sad part is I wished I could have gotten the Neon. Hell at least I know I could take that thing off road. Which I have done, at a friends wedding on Maui. To make things even better is the clown who had the car before me smoked. Which is bad enough, but I think it was the Chronic. So if I get pulled over, I think I will be eating hood as the cops ransack the Aveo looking for drugs and illegal clown shoes.

So Boski where is this going? I am glad you asked. Today I get a call and find out that the repair shop found more damage and have asked that the car be totaled. Come on it only a 97. I still have 12 more payments! So I talk to them and then try to call my insurance agent or agents. For this claim I have had four different people. So now I have to look at the specter of having to get a new/used car before I was ready for one and while I have no job. Damn it I should have taken that llama shaving job when I had the chance. So this weekend I will be stretching out and getting limber because I feeling I am going to be asked to grab my ankles.

So it has been a week and I have done very little with this blogigity. So let’s see what has transpired:

Saw our Godchild last Saturday

Got to enjoy a nice meal with the Better half, with a wonderful view of the ocean. Even though we wanted to throw down against the four old ladies sitting next to us who were kind of moving in to a personal space so they could see what we were having. Listen Golden Girls stop looking at us to see what you are going to gum for dinner!

Saw a movie about clowns and loved it. Go see Rize. Help out Tommy won’t you.

Great weekend other than the Sox losing two to the Cubs!

Monday off to Atlanta for HFH meeting. The flight was alright, I was able to sleep through the Wedding Date. Excellent!

Monday night had dinner with a friend from High School, his wife and their child. It was good to hang out and see him.

My friend took us on an abbreviated tour of Atlanta drove around Tech, CNN Center, Phillips Arena, and Centennial Park. Even went out to the Ted. Braves were on the road, so I will have to come back to catch a game. Even got a nice photo of me standing where Tom House caught a home run ball, it was hit by some guy named Aaron. I think it was Tommy Aaron’s brother. I don’t know I hadn’t heard of him.

Failed at blogging back in at the Wonderful Holiday Inn Select by Hartsfield-Jackson.

Tuesday it was off to World of Coke. I know it touristy, but damn it we wanted to do it. I am not a wine guy, or whiskey man. I do enjoy a good beer. But I have an addiction and it is to soft drinks. There I have laid out my shame, please enjoy. Loved the samples, but I will take the Coke World in Vegas.

Then we were off to an Atlanta institution, The Varsity. To describe would be if Tommy’s and In-N-Out had a very large and southern child. This would be it. I can only image the insanity during a Saturday in the fall.

Our Meeting went well and I did not make an ass out of myself once, okay, but only once.

Tuesday night again failed to blog all you something fierce. Blogger ate my entry. I shouldn’t have messed with the photo function.

Wednesday team Boski called it a wrap after the morning meeting and heading to Hartsfield-Jackson to kill time, four hours. That would be the easy part.

Bad news part II. Team Boski could not obtain seats next to each other. To make things worse, both were middle seats. I know people love those middle seats.

Bad News Part III – As we took out seats, a large gentleman comes to our row and takes the window seat.

Bad News Part III – Things are good on the Better Half’s side two normal sized people are in the seats around her.

Bad News Part IV – Another larger gentleman bigger than the man to my right takes the aisle seat. I am going to be very warm for this flight. Well at least I can still use the arm rest to my right, but any chance of my elbows moving away from my ribs are gone.

Bad News Part V – A very large woman takes the seat in front of me and feels the need to have her seat all the way back for most of the flight. Checkmate.

Look I am not a small person myself buy I felt like Gary Coleman. Needless to say I was sweating through the flight. I think I scared the people in the rows behind me when there was an opening and I was able to make it to freedom. (Thank you large man to my right and your need to pound Royal’s and Coke.) Because I looked like I had graduated from the Norm Peterson School of Sweating. But made it home safely and I can call the trip an unqualified success. Even thought we did not get a chance to have real Southern Food. Rats!

But after all that not much, the Sox are still holding a 10 game lead. Which Elias Sports reports that no team has lost its division when it has lead by double digits. So I could expect that this is year that changes. Oh won’t the blogging be fun then. No I have faith as we march on. I wonder if we will make a move before July 31? Hmmmmm. Interviewed for a job and brought our little computer home. So that is the long and short of what has been going on. Oh wait this just in….

I may have the appearance to be clueless like Admiral Stockdale, but I am back blogging from Boski Manor, in the heart of the O.C. Yes a week has transpired and a lot has been going on for your blogger about town, more about that later. I would like to thank our favorite Redheaded IT man who fought off illness and hard drive of the damned, to get us back up and running. You see we can look at our computer like it was Paul McCrane. Oh our computer was like him back when he was in Fame. We thought we were going to live forever. As time wore on the computer started to act like him in RoboCop we became concerned. We needed to upgrade, but sadly as we tried to upgrade, it Cop Rocked and the ensuing damage we lost our crazy orange fro (our music). But now thanks to RH IT man we are at the ER years. But hopefully the computer will be less of an ass and will not have an arm cut off. So as of right now, the public can return to Crystal Court, I will no longer be a constant eyesore.